Jake's guide on living/studying abroad

My time in Rennes is coming to a close. I have been lucky enough to spend 4 months in Ireland and then an entire academic year in France. I have no regrets in the time that I have spent abroad and people have told me that I am lucky. Until recently I thought the same, but there is no luck. Yes I have taken out large loans, found great programs, but I did this myself and anyone can do it. Say what you want and make any excuse you want, but if you have the kahunas to do it, I promise you will have a lifetime of memories. I'll be honest, being abroad can change you a bit. Yes, I will always be the same guy who speaks before he thinks and puts himself in too many awkward situations to count, but some of your values change a bit. I don't know if it is bad to say, but I feel less ignorant. I have come accustomed to other cultures and don't have the same ignorance that I once displayed. Yes, I love the United States of America, and by far we make the best wings. I can't wait to go to hooters to eat some delicious wings and look at big breasted women. I am actually in a weird spot at the moment because I can't wait to see everyone, but I really don't know how I will adjust to being back home.
Well, there are things that you need to know about spending time abroad. As you could guess, things are not the same. Many things are completely different from what you are used to. Take France for example. The capitalist views that you are used to are not the same. There is no such thing as a 24/7 store. Stores close at 8. Yes 8, like the number of legs that a spider has and the number of chest hairs that it has taken me 23 years to grow. Things are not so easy, and you definitely need to plan more but it is something you get accustomed to. Guess what? American beer sucks. Yea you might be a lover of Bud Light, but I promise you it is shit. Step outside of your comfort zone and try an amazing Guinness or a splendid micro brew called La Chouffe. You will not be disappointed. Yes, when you come home your friends might think you are a pompous asshole for yelling at a bartender for pouring a Guinness wrong or turning your nose to a nasty light beer, but seriously the shit sucks.  You consider these beers you thought were great as beer pong quality at best. It does suck because they are more expensive to buy these imports at home, but your palate will never be the same.
Yes, if you are American like myself, you have no plans to ever learn another language because we are American and English is all we will ever need. Newsflash assholes, Spanish will soon take over as the most spoken language in the world. I have found a new gained respect for my fellow classmates who at least speak 3 languages. Yes, I have not learned a ton of French, but at least I can order a beer and I will at least try a bit, especially when I have had a few drinks. Newsflash, there is more out there than the state lines of Iowa or the borders of the US. I don't know about you, but the best experiences I have had are when I have stepped outside of my comfort zone. Live a little.
Like many of my past residences we are known for having some good parties. Never again will I have a party where there are over 20 different nationalities. Hey, we are all looking for the same thing. Lets get a little tuned up and have some fun. If you are thinking of studying abroad for the first time, I'll let you into a little info. Yes, host families are great for getting acclimated to local culture, but how long has it been since you have lived with your parents. Yes, probably a little bit, so why would you want to live with someones parents that you don't know and actually have to respect. I understand learning a new culture, but why not learn a new culture through people your own age. Its true, you are going to party a bit, so live it up with your own place and throw parties. These actions will be reciprocated I promise. You invite people over for a little shindig and they will invite you over and you will meet so many great people. I'm sure you have gotten set in your own routine, but step outside the box and have some new fun. Seriously, do it.
You will probably get into alternative sports like soccer (football) or rugby. At first you are just looking for a sport to watch, but honestly they are pretty damn cool. When you go home people will continue to say that it sucks, or that it is stupid and your are stupid for enjoying it. Well it is the most popular sport in the world dicks. Go to a small pub that is at capacity and watch a match where people are screaming the entire time. It is quite a bit of fun. Honestly it is not as easy as it looks. I have played a few pick up games and that shit is hard. My first pick up match ever I kicked some dude extremely hard in the leg and knocked him out of the game, but trust me scoring a goal is unlike anything else you have ever experienced.
Friends, food is much different as well. Yes we do the greasy shit well in the states, but these people have been cooking for generations. You think you like wonderbread, well try a f'n baguette. Seriously, I want to make love to one.  These people do bread right and don't even get me started on cheese. Yes, I love pepperjack and wish it was a world wide phenomenon, but I have done quite alright without it. This shit is real. They know what the hell they are doing.

So I have a little experience being abroad so you can refer to me as Socrates or if you are formal, Mr. Grothoff will suffice. Through diligent research I have created a model of reverse culture shock. Yes, it does exist. Going home is great and it is very exciting to see all of the people and friends that you left behind. Those first few weeks of being back are great as you are catching up with old friends and they are actually mildly interested in the stories that you have as you have had the most amazing months of your life. Sorry to say, but the excitement of being home quickly subsides. After the initial warmth of coming home you go into a state of mild depression. You have had so much fun and seen so many amazing things, that you really miss where you came from. After a little bit of sadness you become accustomed to the regular grinds of school, work, and the every day happenings. You finally get back into that normal routine and it feels good. The worst part is soon to come. After feeling completely normal for a few months it hits you. It can be different for all people. It might happen while laying in bed, going to the same bar that you were at the night before, or rubbing one out in the shower. It doesn't matter, but it hits you like a ton of bricks. You are bored and you really miss where you came from. You have had the time of your life and met so many amazing people. It finally becomes a reality and you realize that you will most likely never see many of these people ever again. Yes, thank the lord for Facebook, but it is not the same. It is a tough time and you realize that you are a bit different then your friends. You will be able to pull through and make the best, but you always know that you will only be happy when you travel, So I challenge all of you who have studied abroad to keep traveling. Live life to the fullest and if you are thinking about studying abroad, don't be stupid and do it. I promise you will not regret it. If I ever mess up and have children, knock on wood, I will require them to get some international experience because I think it is the best thing anyone can do. Well I know it was a bit of a rant, but I am going to bed. Au revoir.